I Aint Your Love Robot No More

Well this is something very special. Even by the standards of a blog detailing an imaginary alt-goth band's pretend songs and imbedding YouTube postcards of music, this is special.

This week I was enjoying putting words which rhymed together on a lunchtime in the office and I realised this was it - the 13th song of the album!

On second viewing, I was unsure if it should make the album. This was not the usual Greville and the Tombstones brand of alt-goth country romance to which fans are accustomed.

To be fair, looking at it a third time and if you considered some of it was marginally euphamistic, then it is potentially a song about an Ess-Eee-Ex toy not wanting to be an Ess-Eee-Ex anymore. Or Metal Mickey not wanting to be thought of a peice of meat anymore by his girl.

Pretty much not Greville and the Tombstones at all. In fact it could be seen as sleazy.

Now I don't know much about why I wrote it, but I do know I am changing my lunch treat back from a Cadbury's Twirl.

So, here it is - and it needs no introduction.

I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

You expect you can flick a switch to turn me on

I’ll run my coding, check my morals are gone

I’m your robot

As soon as I walk in through the bedroom door

Emotions of the heart dropped beside clothes on the floor

But I have some news for you

My programme breaks in two

And I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

I need the pain

The feel of guilt

I want to know I can be hurt

I can’t be your love robot

I will calculate your desires, cold touch your needs

As I connect to WI-FI, read updates to RSS feeds

Of sweet nothings

I want to believe we have a pulsating bedroom rapport

That it’s not coolant oil in pistons and circuits which pour

But my techniques are from

A Karma-Sutra CD-ROM

And I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

I need the pain

The feel of guilt

I want to know I can be hurt

I can’t be your love robot

I am incapable of not doing what you want me to

You’ve installed sub-systems to keep me true

Run command

I remember the sighs, saved them to my memory core

Love’s sweet symphony vibrato, just a statistical score

I compute a million algorithms all for your pleasure

So whose buttons are getting pressed?

When I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

I need the pain

The feel of guilt

I want to know I can be hurt

I can’t be your love robot

You turn one point four-four floppies into gigabyte hard drives

You know only for you are my magnetic tape eyes

It’s so true

Binary weeps zero add one, I sure can’t go on anymore

I need to defrag my operating system, re-set me I implore

Not just you having a good time

When you tap key Function 9

And I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

I need the pain

The feel of guilt

I want to know I can be hurt

I can’t be your love robot

You said it couldn’t be, well it can, your Robot has become man

So whose buttons are getting pressed?

When I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

I can stand up on my own two feet

Now you can’t control-alt-delete

And I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

And I Ain’t Your Love Robot No More

And with that, the album is done.

#thereisnoalbum