Romantic Masochist: live!

Above the darkened laboratory, slick with night, a thunder whip crack of lightning boils the heavy rain. Was that the storm or someone inside the walls, wailing? A creak of a wooden beam, or a neck? On a night such as this anything could happen.

Yes, on a night such as this, anything could happen. A lyric without a sound can even gain a voice.

The incredible @SoBukiRa has made this top YOUTUBE (!!!) video, giving cool life to the Greville and the Tombstones lyric, The Romantic Masochist. I think her voice is amazing and it helps for a video that Buki just a bit all-round-hot too.





Seriously, I am constantly humbled when people read these sweet alt-goth words and imbibe them a soul from their enjoyment.

I remain confused and as entertained as anyone with your love of a band that is only in my head. I am very lucky for Twitter to have introduced me to so many cool people.

Thank you, Buki, on a night such as this you have made my day!

HEART ERECTION!

Inspiration comes in many guises. The way a girl dances alone in the far corner across the room like she is the music made flesh. Two dragonflies playing only inches above a pond under a watery sun of warming summer morning. A feeling you recognise so well because it comes to you so often you've given it a name. A friend returning from a holiday on Crete with a bottle of Heart Erection Par-Fume which she bought. As I say, who knows where I get my ideas from.





This song is scuzzy lo-fi rock, y'know: for the kids. It's Called:
Heart Erection

 

Heart erection!

Heart erection!

I got me a heart erection!

Whoa-ho!

 

Sundial at noon

The sun rose at noon

And still it rose too soon

 

See

 

I got eyes that flicker low

Candles flame at haunted window

I got teeth I grind hard

Crooked tombstones in a graveyard

 

Woo!

But I’m feeling happy, the evening’s fine

I’ve got this girl’s hand in mine

 

Heart erection!

I got me a heart erection!

Whoa-ho!

 

Oil slick night

Satin dress tight

This bottom lip bite

 

See

 

I’m wired for you girl so bad

With one stroke you switch off my sad

Evil is in the Devil’s plan

I signed the contract to be your man

 

 

Woo!

Devil knows ya can’t spell satin without sin

I can’t see lust without you in

 

See

 

The Devil did well, though I’m off to Hell

It’s worth it for you, And that’s a fact,

To have made this demon lover pact

To turn me into perfection

To give you a heart erection!

 

Oh Yeah!

Heart erection!

I got me a heart erection!

Whoa-ho!

 

Bloodied heart

Four chambered heart

Cannot sever never part

 

Priest best clear his diary for my confession

I got me a heart erection!

I got me a heart erection!

Woo! Woo!

It's the Woo Woo parts that's the kids'll dig the most.

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds

It's a summer's day. Here is a song.


It's Called:
Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds

Blood is draining from my brain

My vision is dim

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

Once I caught the sight of you

When you came in

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

Wishbone corset, bone thin fingers,

Cold, rictus grin

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

Reverb of a tolling churchyard bell

Deep inside, within

 

Oh, immediately I love you!

Oh, immediately a feeling true!

Like a snake bite of sweet venom!

Sadness now a shallow I have swum!

So take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

The killer heels signal clear

Dance we’ll begin

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

In your direction is a vortex

Gladly I’ll spin

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

 

At the tunnel’s end, a grave

I will end up in

Take me while I’m smiling, black winged birds!

It’s basically if death was a lovely lady.

The Romantic Masochist: acoustic version

@greebstreebling came to me with the idea for me to handwrite some of my lyrics. So I opened my note book and did.

I guess this is Greville and the Tombstones unplugged.

So here is the acoustic version of The Romantic Masochist. Mandolin not drawn.

The Romantic Masochist

A Typo (www.theretronaut.com)

Valentine's Day was made for this.

A song perfect for this day of love and relationships and perfect for a second album.

This a song about the purest love for someone: altgoth love.
Unrequited love.

This is a love song for you.












It's called:


The Romantic Masochist

This is a song I wrote about a lovely relationship.

It might have needed more hammer.

Please don’t touch me,

Deny me your tender kiss

Because I’m your romantic masochist

Don’t put me out my misery

Because it’s what makes me, me

Your static hard-line stare

Only says to me you care

I’m Hurtin’,  I am Hurtin

But to me, it’s just flirtin

Don’t put me out my misery

Because it’s what makes me, me

Please don’t touch me,

Deny me your tender kiss

Because I’m your romantic masochist

My spirit is a glass blown

Ornament never shown

With a breath, shatter me

I’ll crawl on it, hand ‘n knee

Don’t put me out my misery

Because it’s what makes me, me

I need you to hammer

Home the lover

With a claw hammer

From the shed

Take the hammer

Take the hammer

Hammer home the lover

Until it’s over

Until it’s done

Smell of desperate sweat

Polishing tarnished regret

I am broken and I’m done

But I’ve had, so much fun

Don’t put me out my misery

Because it’s what makes me, me

Please don’t touch me,

Deny me your tender kiss

Because I’m your romantic masochist

And here is the single sleeve art:



A love song that thinks it's dying

Hello.
Here is the best song about love ever written. Or at least it would be if it had a chorus. Or a tune. So it is only possibly the best song about love ever written, but certainly the best song about love ever written by Greville and the Tombstones, at a lunchtime.

I hope you enjoy it.

It's called:

Frog in a Beaker

Is that a flutter in my soul?

Or is it a death twitch?

These days hard to say,

Which is which

So tough to tell,

If I’m sick or well

Am I just feeling calm?

‘fore a comin’ storm?

Skies are always dark

Chill I can’t warm

So got no plan

I’m no weatherman

Future the Present stole

The Past is made of coal

Life goes into a black hole

Is this Devil’s theatre?

Am I playing a part?

A script I can’t follow

Plot hole of the heart

So I lie I confess

You I try to impress

Yeah, your eyes twinkle

In the electric bright

Of this buzzing neon

Gas warnin’ light

So hard to see

What’s hurtin’ me

Love is anaesthesia

Buried dread is amnesia

Lust is involuntary seizure

Hangin’ out with you

Without a care

Chemicals boiling

None too aware

Gettin’ weaker

Like a frog in a beaker

I ain’t noticin’ the situation

Like a frog in a beaker

 


  I have not made a CD cover design for it yet.

A Grevilly Christmas!

I tweeted the lyrics as #grevadvent in December 2013 and this is what's behind the 24th door! Welcome grevadventurers!

This is the #grevadvent tweets collected and presented as the Greville and the Tombstones' Christmas song!!

It is not exactly #altgothic and not the usual romance ballad, but if it was good enough for The Darkness not to take themselves too seriously for once and to do a one off novelty seasonal track, then it is good enough for ol' Greville and the Tombstones.

I hope it gets all fans of the band and indeed everyone in the festive mood! It ticks all the boxes - Santa, mistletoe and tinsel.

Imagine, like, loads of sleigh bells being jingled during it, too, if you want.

It'd definitely get onto Now This Is Christmas! if it was actually a song.

The B-Side would be a 7 min composition called: Santa's Right For Dub.

Merry Seasonal Times - one and all!

Here is the single cover:

On the Naughty List

*Those lyrics in italic are sung by She Scoops Out Owls For Hats or another darlin'.

[Sampled curt 1964 BBC styled male voice] We all go in, we-all-go-out, we all go in, we-all-go-out

I aint getting a present this Christmas

I aint getting a nutmeg, mistletoe kiss

Saint Nick checked and here’s a twist

My name’s twice on the Naughty List

 

Oh… I’ve been bad

Made my pretty darlin’ sad

When she impales the angel on top of the tree

Well, I think she’s thinkin’ of me

 

Oh-ho…

 

Snow layin’ and deep’nin’

Low as sobs of my darlin’s weepin’

When she hangs her stocking at the chimney

Well, I think she’s thinkin’ of me

 

I aint getting a present this Christmas

I aint getting a nutmeg, mistletoe kiss

Saint Nick checked and here’s a twist

My name’s twice on the Naughty List

 

Oh… I’ve been bad

Worst Christmas we have had

When she puts down Mary in the nativity

Well, I think she’s thinkin’ of me

 

Oh-ho…

 

Orange n’ cinnamon nights,

Outside glitter and tinsel frost bites

When she carves up the Christmas turkey

Well, I think she’s thinkin’ of me

 

Whoa-ho…

I’m strung out on merry lights, Strung out on those berry lights

 

If you hope to get absolution,

You’ll need more than keepin’ a New Year’s resolution!

 

Oh Darlin’! I can change, don’t fear,

I’ll get Saint Nick to score my name off twice next year.

 

Some piece of work you turned out to be,

I know you aint ever were thinkin’ of me!

 

No–ho-ho…

 

I aint getting a present this Christmas

I aint getting a nutmeg, mistletoe kiss

Saint Nick checked and here’s a twist

My name’s twice on the Naughty List

It’s a twist ‘cos my name’s twice on the Naughty List

[Sampled US 1950’s girl group] Jing, jing, jinglin’ an’ Jing, jing, jinglin’ on, an’ [to quick fade-out]

Another battler of soulweeds

This is another set of lyrics. Or rather this is not another set of lyrics. If these lyrics were an actress they would be Kirsten Dunst.

Not perhaps the tastefully lit REM video where I (sorry, we) have an invite to fall for the pure innocent essence of Kirsten all over again.


Kirsten *sigh*


No, they would be Kirsten Dunst singing an early 80's hit in a less than comfortable manga p0rny styled music video.



That's why these just are not another set of lyrics.

These lyrics are a continuation of the New Mermaid Sound for the new album and I am fond of them.


This is you favourite imaginary alt-gothic band!!

Another Battler of Soulweeds:

I’m battling the Soulweeds heavy today

Not complaining, I have found a way

As they say

A shallow grave still has heavy soil

The digger needs a spade down with toil

And the dirt feels like clay

For you, I battle Soulweeds

When I think of all your past deeds

You equipped me with all my needs

To go battling Soulweeds

I’m battling hard to even get moving today

As mist on a tune, I hang onto a cold day

It’s all grey

Like a derelict web on a winter tree

I cling shivering onto what used to be

Emotions caught me good

For you, I battle Soulweeds

When I think of all your past deeds

You equipped me with all my needs

To go battling Soulweeds

I’m battling shadows slow-jamming today

Hurt you gave me, Just chemical odelay

I am OK

Your actions planted the seeds

And now I am battling Soulweeds

Just battling against Soulweeds

I’ll face those Soulweeds, they won’t win!

I’ll look them absolute in the eye

I’ll battle those Soulweeds, won’t give in!

I’ll cut them down, watch them die

I’m battling passion storms blowing today

I am in a nihilistic, Combat mood way

Loaded misery

I’m a lone tragedy taking a walk

Tell by bloodied eyes, had ‘nuff talk

About all this today

For you, I always battle Soulweeds!

When I think of all your past deeds

You equipped me with all my needs

To go battling Soulweeds

To go battling Soulweeds

[we battle soulweeds we battle soulweeds we battle soulweeds we battle soulweeds]

God created you mortal but I can sort that, baby

Although the second album is mainly about the new, fan alienating sound, I am not Radiohead and so here is a song kind of more in the style of the old, popular stuff.

I like to think that the protagonist in this sweet put lyric is not a scientist with a lab at all, but a Saturday store assistant in Argos with a large store room (an Argos Extra?) who has had too much opportunity to think about the big questions in life between collection points and as a result has gone a bit odd.

I give you:

God created you mortal but I can sort that, Baby

God had all the elements to hand

Rolling atomic particles smaller than grains of sand

Thrown into the void, they were set free

Eventually some of them combined and fused to make you and me

What if we’re not a product of design?

What if all this is just an experiment: X over time?

What if God cares not of your life or mine?

What if God is a Scientist, we mistake notes in jotters as divine?

Made with a timer so we'll all eventually die

Life is so simple to stop and squeeze out a last sigh

Innards fail, madness prevails in milky eye

A scientist needs to find a God Clock vaccine and that scientist is I

God created you mortal but I can sort that, Baby

God didn’t make you immortal, but I can if you’d let me

I can put a glass panel in your abdomen bare

Doctors will see your organs healthy pink with no tare

You’ll live forever so long as days remain fair

If you’ll only let me sew solar panels into your long greying hair

God created you mortal but I can sort that, Baby

God didn’t make you immortal, but I can if you’d let me

I’ll replace weak flesh muscle for a carbonate part

Giving you motion, a 12 volt battery is only the start

I’ve planned you out on a systematic Gantt chart

Shockproof wheels, springs, pistons and brass valves for a heart

God created you mortal but I can sort that, Baby

God didn’t make you immortal, but I can if you’d let me

But if you're to survive, you first need the cut of my knife

Death’s never solved in stories without elegant sacrifice

For you to live, I need to cut out God's clock

Replace it with one I have in the back, from my own stock

God created you mortal but I can sort that, Baby

Live! Live!

I couldn’t stand myself thinking of saying goodbye

I kept you in my lab, knowing Death was a goddamn lie

Stab! Stab! Have to find your clock as moments tick by

As life flows in tubed osmosis, I think I see you leak out a cry

And I cry too,

You see I'm giving you the last clock in store,

Not sure we'll get in any more

I now have someone like you to live for,

So my inevitable death is cruel

The Mermaid See Blues

Unicorns were so last album. That's not what the kids want no more. Now Greville and the Tombstones is bringing Mermaids back.

Yeah - all about the mermaids with the alt-gothic kids.

Here is the first tuneless song for the second not real album by an imaginary alt-gothic band:


The See Mermaid Blues

My soul down as a shipwreck

Shoals of demons swim above

The sunken treasure of my love

I swam through, sweet mermaid,

Seaweed the deadly nightshade

Of sea-witch brew

Wanting to be with you, dear

But far-off stars you wish upon

Are merely fluorescent plankton

Your big eyes paler blue

Than any love so true

That could ever be

I didn't see

They were the bolt not the key

Your sea chest,

Davey Jones locker

I thought you were so attractive

But it was just the refractive

Nature of the water

Oh Yeah, oh yeah

It’s a curse

I see mermaids